It was 1pm and I got home from my morning shift as a teacher that started at 430am. [I currently teach Chinese students how to speak English. Since they’re 13 hours ahead of us, I work in the wee hours of the night. I’ve always liked to work in this quiet time.]
I decided to take this midday break to get inspired by a business documentary. I typed in the Netflix search bar “Business,” and this was the first documentary to pop up.
At first I assumed it was a series, filled with different people, brands, and stories, but then when I lost interest in the characters, I checked the runtime: it was in fact a movie.
So I buckeled down and decided to continue listening to this documentary to see what I could get out of it. I was seeking external inspiration because I was exhausted already internally. I have to pay the bills, but if I hadn’t just worked/been awake for the past 9 hours, I may have found some internal energy.
The movie did not inspire me, but it did make me feel a lot happier about the choices I have made. All of the characters in this documentary are college students. They are all under the age of 25 and showing the drive they have. THE PROBLEM is that they are driving toward something, but not towards what they love to do.
They are all driving towards words and ideas like “RICH, SUCCESS, FINANCIALLY STABLE, and FREEDOM, ” yet they continue to find themselves poor, cold, starving, sad, and alone throughout this film. They aren’t connecting with thier product, brand, or culture. They are simply working all hours of the night FOR ANOTHER JOB.
Who cares if the company is just beginning, I thought the idea of a startup was doing something that warms you from the inside? You know, like saving a life or giving people clean water, or changing the food system…
These people were just working their asses off, complaining about their job. Even if they found success, they were still not happy. They’re like “Yep! We did it!” as if they just completed a philosophy final in college. There was no real gratification, love, or tears. It was cold, heartless, and meaningless. I wouldn’t suggest this film to anyone because it is simply un-inspired.
The film was made in the same way the students completed their work: just to get it done; not to do it well, or for a purpose.
—- END REVIEW —-
PERSONAL CONNECTION
My grandma always told me, “Find your niche and stick to it.” As a kid, I understood “niche” as the thing I was good at, like talking to my sad friends and making them feel better. As an adult, I find again, that one of my talents is talking to sad (sick) people and helping them feel better. Through trials, failures, and tribulations, (and being strongly led by my current Partner), I have found that who I am is who I want to be.
I used to deny all of the interesting parts of me. All of the things that make me interesting, I bury.
As a teen on myspace, I blogged in this personal fashion daily. Most of the time it was early mornings or late nights, when the energy was cleanest outside and no thoughts or sounds were invading my space. Then, I was convinced by family and friends that I was sharing too much. I was online too much. I was on cam too much. I had too many online friends. Go outside and play.
Yes, this is true. But if I would have stuck to being me, I would now have a 15 years of social media content under my name. Instead, I made and deleted many accounts over the years, emotionally. I never saw myself as a business, but I’ve been it the whole time.
I’ve been capable of creating any life I want, and never gave myself the full commitment to do so.
I would like to inspire everyone to fail, fail, and fail again until they find out who and what they truly want to be in this world. No age is too old. Where does your heart feel most full? Try all of the sports. Listen to all of the music. Explore all of the ideas. Let fear go in the breeze, as a child would when they are discovering.
Stick to it, don’t give a shoot what other people think, and do YOU!
Nixie Dee 